I've never been good at defending myself. I think it is because I grew up in a family culture where I wasn't allowed to speak back to my parents. Thus today I find myself completely open to any kind of criticism, really. I will listen and rake it. Absorb, and not deflect.
Being open to receiving criticism is one thing; being completely immune to it is something else. To be wrong never feels good. The question to ask yourself though is whether it hurts more to hear it from others? Or does it torment you even more when the questioning comes from within. For me it is the latter. And for that reason, listening to criticism is possible because it doesn't smart as much as knowing deep inside that you are not meeting your own internal standards.
To be wrong gives the opportunity to reflect and to advance internally; to be right eliminates the need to be pensive and provides visible evidence that advancement is achieved. Although the latter is more efficient strategy for winning, the former is necessary to achieve internal growth.
I wonder at times what a good Defense is versus a good Offense. I find that either mode does not fit how I approach my own philosophy of life. Not because they are somehow wrong ... they're just not me. Finding me is an important task in everyone's life I think. I'm still looking for him.
In summary, I hope in my life that I don't have to Defend my beliefs, nor should I have to Offend others with them. Neither a D, nor an O. I think I prefer to just DO. It's simpler that way.
Posted by maeda at October 13, 2007 08:14 AM